me, the messy

so much that I can say to you, my voice shakes from the hurt that i hide
ashamed of my existence and of my petty often wounded pride
i like to come home to see you and to catch your sickness by the bedside
but then you know how much i really need you
all the love in an instant makes my life stop
but then my hate for you makes my feelings all together drop

if only i were blind to your selfish fling and your desperate cause
and impress you for the details that threaten my physical flaws
i like to come home to see you and embrace your illness
but then you know how much i really need you
all the love in an instant makes my life stop
but then my hate for you makes my feelings all together drop

so much that i can say to you with affection that i burn inside
your aching from the distance avoiding strength that's running, still alive
if only i could heal you in the sprinkling of the ocean's side
but then you know how much i really love you
all the love in an instant makes my life stop
but then my hate for you makes my feelings all together drop

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makes me remember of jon's marriage...